Caring about the boss LO18739

Robert Bacal (rbacal@escape.ca)
Mon, 27 Jul 1998 00:26:34 +0000

Replying to LO18724 --

On 25 Jul 98 at 12:24, Brock Vodden wrote:

> Replying to LO18718 --
>
> Don: You wrote, in part,

> I continued to work in that department for a couple of years, but
> avoided as much as possible any contact with this person. It was not
> just a matter of "hurt feelings" as some have suggested; this was a
> dangerous person in a powerful position who could cause anyone
> around him serious professional damage through his lack of ethical
> standards.

No, it's not about hurt feelings at all. I wrote some stuff on this a
while back, on the TOXIC MANAGER. The kind of behavior you have described
is typical of people who are also doing other manipulative, dishonest or
otherwise destructive or abusive things to people in their employ. Again,
in many situations, they are simply sufficiently maladjusted to the extent
that they are almost driven, by their personal agendas or shortcomings to
do these things. They may have ethics in areas where they function well,
but they are overwhelmed by their own personal need.

> I was fortunate in that I had a choice of whether to take the
> promotion and report to him permanently, or to stay in my original
> management role with a buffer between us. I know there are many
> others who are stuck with bosses in whom they have no confidence or
> trust, but have no alternative short of resigning. Many of those
> folks cope quite well under those difficult circumstances.

I left a toxic manager, and we were both glad. Gave up a huge salary.
NO regrets. My thinking on it was primarily that I got paid to do a
job, and that I couldn't do that job to the best of my abilities
working for a semi-unbalanced boss who couldn't cope and was abusive
to people.

No amount of money or security could counter the idea that I was
wasting my time in that job, because I could no longer make a
difference. He's still at his job...has a staff of three now, down
from like 17. I feel sorry for the people who are there.

Pssst...little secret. I suspect the universe has dealt with him in
its own way....what goes around comes around, and I doubt he has much
joy in his work.

Robert Bacal, Inst.For Cooperative Communication, rbacal@escape.ca
NOW SHIPPING Conflict Prevention In The Workplace - Using Cooperative Communication
Samples and info at http://www.escape.ca/~rbacal/prevent.htm
Visit our Resource Centre for articles on mgmt.,training,communication, and defusing hostility
at http://www.escape.ca/~rbacal (204) 888-9290

-- 

"Robert Bacal" <rbacal@escape.ca>

Learning-org -- Hosted by Rick Karash <rkarash@karash.com> Public Dialog on Learning Organizations -- <http://www.learning-org.com>