Women's Ways of Learning LO24687

From: Sajeela M ramsey (sajeelacore@juno.com)
Date: 05/26/00

Replying to LO24660 --

Dear Winnifred and Co-learners,
On the fly here. Much traveling due to consulting assignments. What
caught my eye/ear about your letter:

On Tue, 23 May 2000 17:30:29 +0200 "Winfried Dressler"
<winfried.dressler@voith.de> writes:
> the cultural connotations of the use of words which are meant to
> convey
> feelings are often unknown and/or misinterpreted within a reader in
> another part of the world. And I hope that the word 'sweet' does not
> have the same meaning
> as
> the literal translation 'suess' in german. Here it has the main
> connotation of childish naiveness or sticky...;-)

Yes, Winnifred i debated about using that word-----but decided in the end
to use it anyway---it is a bit maudlin, but anyway, I felt you were very
sincere, and I felt touched.

> First I had to realize
> that not
> all people are intimidating. Helpers, in my mind, were somehow
> dominating.
> I was quite trapped within my beliefs.

Ahhh. the eternal struggle to transcend one's own beliefs! I know this one
only too well.
> 'art of
> communication' - NLP.

Very good stuff this NLP. I really like Dawna Markova's take on it, with
three levels of conciousness, and a preferred mode on each level. I am a
KVA. Kinisthetic on the front or concious layer, Visual on the unconcious
and auditory on the subconcious level. Thus I learn this way: first i
receive a feeling, then I integrate that feeling with a visual image, and
finally, I hear it. people with this configuration are very sensitive to
sound and language, and may be given to writing poetry. There are I think
about 12 combinations of the three letters, and/or as many "types" of
learning styles.

> I think I have learnt a lot. But most profound
> was
> the insight, that one has to come into contact and communicate,
> dialogue
> with the enemies within, so that we can find a base on which we
> might
> become friends.
I completely agree. have you done much shadow work? have you heard of
Sidra and Hal Stone's (Jungian based) work? They describe a whole host of
internal archetypes, including a number of enemies (killer, dominator,
etc.) within.

> Power can have two ways of articulation:
> constructive and destructive.

Don Klein has written a great book on Power, describing seven types. Can
tell you more if you are interested. he definitely approaches it with
shadow work.

> domination is not the
> dualistic
> counterpart of partnership. In fact domination seems to be a special
> form
> of partnership
> On
> the other hand, constructive partnership builds on inner domination
> in one
> or more strengths, which is the core of difference and diversity.

Yes indeed, I do subscribe to these notions. They are part of the theory
behind doing shadow work; aknowledging how we participate in a dance with
our "opressors", until we can get into a pluralist mindset where
differences are OK. That does not mean that I don't have preferences or
values, or that I am OK with opression as I perceive it. I just understand
about projecting onto others my own inner opression, and I try to stay
aware when I am doing that. And I am aware that I can accept that others
may have different values without feeling threatened about losing my own.
Still, i do set boundaries when I feel it is appropriate.

> Was sharing this experience also
> sufficient
> for understanding?

Sufficient enough for me!

Hot afternoon and cool breezes,

Sajeela Moskowitz Ramsey, President - CORE Consulting
Center for Organizational Renewal and Effectiveness
2432 Villanova Drive/Vienna, VA. 22180
703 573 7050/ SajeelaCore @Juno.com


Sajeela M ramsey <sajeelacore@juno.com>

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