Levels of Intimacy in Communication LO18670

Fri, 17 Jul 1998 23:16:44 EDT

Replying to LO18644 --

I've found that the more authentic I am with others, the more they are
with me as well. So it involves my expressing myself more deeply with
others, speaking more from the heart. Of course, I meet with a lot of
people who have no interest in, or ability to, talk in that way. But I am
often surprised at the number of people who are. I see the same thing at
some of the workplaces I get involved with; e.g., the more authentic the
leader is with people, the more so they are with each other. Does a great
deal towards cultivating a climate of safety, trust, and community.

Sometimes it seems that, by speaking more deeply myself, others have
'permission' (not a good word, but I'm blank by what else I mean here) to
also be more authentic. But it demands increasing knowledge of myself,
and that takes some work. It is easier, and 'safer,' to keep my
relationships on more of a surface level, and I often find myself doing
that--especially when there seem to be more than the usual demands on my
psychic energy. But I, too, ultimately miss feeling more connected with
the people about me.

Good subject!


Terri A Deems, PhD DAI/WorkLife Design tadeems@aol.com

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